Thursday, September 22, 2011

The Past

Ouch, My heart feels heavy again~~ It feels burdened.
Time like this when it feel lonely is when I question myself if I'm doing the right thing, and Seriously!! What is Wrong with me??? I should stop thinking about the past, I should stop thinking too much.. But it can't be help. I should be strong and face this. I should overcome this...

If I've made the decision and decided to go with it, then I should be strong and goes through it!! Be Strong Grace. Please Give me strength. The future is where I'm heading, not the past. Focus on moving forward!

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

My Heart Feels Heavy again..

My heart feels heavy. I'm about to make a decision that I may regret later and it may be hurtful for another if she got to know about it. But this decision is for the good and happiness of another friend and her group.

I feel upset for now because if what I plan to do works, it will mean that I lose a close friend that I can rely one whilst I'm here leaving me with less shoulder to cry on when I need it. The efforts put into making this new friend will be wasted and it took me a long while and courage to open up and establish this friendship.
I feel however, I can bear the consequences better now that I've experienced and been through these times before several times. When I first went to study in UK and when I started Uni.

I suppose there will be other alternatives to this solution but I can't think of any that works better and faster than this at the moment. I just hope things will work out and it's actually not as serious as I thought it was. I do tend to over-think things although for best intention, it's not voluntarily intended.

Please God (although I've not been very religious), I hope and wish no one will get hurt and unhappy. I rather pain myself than seeing others hurt. Thanks